Before you follow...

mun Mars ( he / him , 30+ )
plotting restricted
discord available to mutuals upon request
anon off indefinitely
timezone PST / PDT
affiliates @feilien / @alreadybrcken
other blog(s) @thiefofcrows

Minors and non-roleplay blogs, dni. Please read the rules before interacting.

  001.   Hi, my name is MARS!!  My pronouns are he / him, and I'm a little over 30. I’ve been roleplaying on tumblr since 2011 ( 14+ years!! ), so these rules have accumulated from all that time and experience here. They may seem a bit strict, but I'm very chill and easy-going usually. I keep trying my best to NOT make these crazy long lmao.This is a PRIVATE and HIGHLY SELECTIVE roleplay blog for my own fandomless, crime-based original character. I also write Kaz Brekker over @thiefofcrows, but my focus is mainly here atm. I work 40 hours a week, but I tend to travel a lot. I've also got bad chronic allergy issues, so activity can be sporadic.  002.   I WILL NOT WRITE WITH ANYONE UNDER THE AGE OF 21. As I said, I'm a bit over 30 and that age gap is uncomfortable tbh. Minors will be soft blocked. If you keep trying to follow / interact after that, you're getting hard blocked. If I find out you lied about your age, instant hard block. There will be no exceptions.  003.   This blog contains POTENTIALLY TRIGGERING AND MATURE CONTENT, so interact AT YOUR OWN RISK — gang violence,  torture,  cult-like brainwashing / manipulation,  &  mentions of human trafficking. In the PB verse, there's heavy implications of forced underage sex work, rape/sexual assault and dubious consent. I don't tag any of my content currently, but you're more than welcome to ask me to tag something for you.I firmly believe that fiction =/= reality and that people can write literally whatever they want as long as they are not actively causing harm and everyone involved is a consenting adult.
If people give warning and/or tag their shit, it is 1000% YOUR RESPONSIBILITY to curate your own experience and keep yourself safe. It is not my job, nor is it the job of strangers on the internet, to do any of that for you.  004.   I do not do one liners, short-para or text message threads. If you can't handle AT LEAST 3-4 PARAGRAPHS, this likely isn't the blog for you.I'm a multi-para / novella focused writer. DEPTH is what I'm interested in, NOT two, maybe three para threads. I am here for complex, nuanced stories and dynamics and you just can't get things like that with shorter threads. That being said, I'm not trying to write with tons of people at once, nor have tons of threads at once, either. FIVE OR SIX WRITING PARTNERS AT A TIME is usually my limit. I'm unlikely to start another thread with you until we finish the one we're working on tbh. Also, despite how Zane's bio is written, I ONLY write in 3rd person past tense. Lastly, English is my native language and I ONLY write in English.I DO NOT ROLEPLAY OVER DISCORD.  NOTE:   ABOUT DIALOGUE; I strive to write it to emulate real life conversations, which means my muse very well may not respond to everything yours says. I usually shoot for having my character ANSWER THE LAST CHUNK OF DIALOGUE FIRST.
THEN, depending on the character and the conversation, I'll have them work their way back to any previous things they feel the need to acknowledge. Sometimes my muse won't directly respond to pieces of dialogue, but we can always come back to it and shoehorn him into responding if we want or need to.  005.   I WILL NOT put up with TERFS/RADFEMS/TRANSMEDS, transphobia, homophobia, passive aggressive behavior, gaslighting, vague blogging, callout / purity culture, mob mentality, harassment / suicide baiting, ect. I also have absolutely zero tolerance for Trump supporters, NO EXCEPTIONS. I will not reblog callouts, PERIOD. I don't reblog political posts here either and I actively filter out related tags. This is an ESCAPE from The Horrors of real life in order to maintain my sanity. I will not apologize for that.

  006.   DO NOT GOD MOD OR METAGAME. I control my character, you control yours. The only exception is ofc if we've DISCUSSED something where one of us has to move things along for the plot.
Zane is not an open book, regardless of how warm and charming he may appear. He is intentionally SECRETIVE AND ELUSIVE about himself. Your muse will not know things about him unless it's been plotted and/or he reveals them himself eventually.

  007.   I use 540x100 icons ( 100x100 icon with blockquotes and other fancy stuff, which I designed myself ), banners, separators and small text, that’s pretty much it, aside from some bold and italics for flare. It doesn't bother me at all if you don't use icons, I will follow suit in our threads if you want. All I ask is folks use small text when writing with me.My icons and graphics are all made by me, although the coloring PSD I use for my icons comes from @poohsources. I just make some slight adjustments here and there. I've made matching icons / banners / theme graphics ect. for my partner ( @feilien / @alreadybrcken ) but otherwise, my graphics are for MY USE ONLY.  008.   This blog is PRIVATE, HIGHLY SELECTIVE AND MUTUALS ONLY, which is just an extensive way of saying that 1. I'm very picky and 2. I only write with those who are in a mutual follow with me. I only allow mutuals to send me messages and reply to my posts as well. This is for my own comfort and peace of mind.If I follow you / follow you back, it's because I think you / your blog / your muses, ect. seem cool and our muses could have fun / interesting dynamics. I want to attempt to cultivate a no-pressure, easy-going environment for myself and others, so there's no pressure to reach out to me super fast, there's no time limit for it really either and I expect the same courtesy in return. I'm not at all shy about it these days so it's likely I'll reach out quick. I just don't think there should be high pressure for a rp hobby.Some reasons I might not follow or unfollow: if you post more ooc than writing and/ or if I have to scroll for miles to even find any writing at all, if 90% of your writing is one liners, single or otherwise short paras, reblogging memes over and over to the point of it being EXCESSIVE AF, frequent negativity towards source material, CONSTANT, IMPULSIVE BLOG HOPPING/INCONSISTENCY!!!, no rules and/or no muse info, you write with an ungodly amount of people at a time, ect. I am also very wary of multi-muse blogs and most of the previous mentions tend to be why.ANON IS OFF AND IT WILL STAY OFF. Sorry for any shy beans, but my trust and good will has been broken in that regard.  009.   Any and all mains are listed here. EXCLUSIVES aren't all that common for me, but sometimes it happens, usually in verses and aus. This character is partnered with J ( @feilien ) and I'm generally heavily affiliated / exclusive with their other blog, @alreadybrcken, as well.
Mains and/or affiliates get PRIORITIZED. That's because of a few reasons — in the case of J, they're my partner irl and our chemistry is Off The Charts™, they are and always will be first and foremost. Anyone else I consider a main, we're very good friends and we / our muses have really good chemistry as well. My prioritizing them has nothing to do with how I feel about other folks I'm writing / roleplaying with.  010.   First and foremost, I want to preface this with saying that my ship with Matt ( @feilien ) is Canon.™  If I have a ship with you in ANY verse, even if Zane and Matt aren't Together, ideally, they're DEEPLY important to one another nonetheless. Both Zane and Matt will have to work through some complicated feelings and if possible, they will be best friends if they're not romantically involved.

I SHIP CHEMISTRY — although I write Zane as DEMISEXUAL. This means he doesn't really experience sexual attraction unless he's formed a bond with someone ( but a bond doesn't guarantee those feelings either ). However, assuming we've discussed things at length and we're both comfortable, I love shipping!! Zane is also BIROMANTIC, so muses of ALL GENDERS are welcome, as long as there is chemistry. Poly ships ARE NOT my cup of tea though ( and honestly it isn't Zane's either ), so I don't write them, but I support those who do, of course.I AM AN ACE PERSON MYSELF and ace-centric characters are just far more natural for me to write and connect with tbh. If sex is a necessity / priority for your muse to be in a romantic relationship, shipping with me is probably not going to work tbh.  011.   I strive to be an HONEST AND OPEN person about things, even when doing so is difficult or a little scary. Honesty, open communication and compassion is what I strive for and I expect the same courtesy in return. If you have any issues, come talk to me.I LOVE making friends with my writing partners, so that's the angle I'm coming from. I tend to be a warm and affectionate person and I do my best to be mindful of the feelings of others as well as their boundaries.  012.   We all have our spelling and/or grammar mistakes every now and then, but if this happens FREQUENTLY in your writing, that's something I can't deal with. If your flow, grammar and sentence structure is wonky to me, I very likely WILL NOT follow you. This happens sometimes with people who write English as their second language and, if this is the case, I am genuinely sorry — but I'm here to HAVE FUN and Working With That is not at all fun for me. I wish you the best nonetheless.  013:   Genuinely CANNOT believe this is something I have to put in my rules, but — if you're using AI to write your replies, obviously you are beyond not welcome here. If I find out that's what you're doing, instant hard block, no exceptions.  014:   Lastly, I am indeed a white person writing a Chinese character. I've done, and continue to do, EXTENSIVE research on Chinese culture and history, including the history of Chinese immigration to Chinatown in San Francisco. I have been there several times with my partner and we're ALWAYS seeking history and information to further contextualize our story. It's very important to me to be culturally accurate / sensitive and I strive to do the best I can, as I have a deep love and respect for the Chinese culture and history I have learned.But ultimately I am not a poc, which means I LACK the nuance of lived experience. So, if I make ANY mistakes, I'm always open to criticism. All I ask for is patience and kindness.And obviously, we DO NOT TOLERATE fetishizing, whitewashing, stereotyping, and / or infatizing Asian people in this house, it's weird and it's racist af. I refuse to write or associate with those who do those things or condone it.

Thanks for reading! :)

 
PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION / FIRST IMPRESSION
Standing at an even SIX FEET TALL, Zane has a lean, but subtly muscular build. His stride conveys an air of confidence and ease, but it's clear that he still carries SOME kind of weight on his shoulders, even if he seems to carry it well.The INTENSITY of his dark eyes, sharp features accompanied with the scars that adorn his face and neck, he can be very intimidating. He is known as the HUYAO for his ruthlessness, cunning and charm. However, that charm can lead him to seem like a warm, safe and easygoing guy — this, along with his QUIET MYSTERY, tends to be very magnetic.Ultimately, it can CHANGE between the two, depending on how he wants someone to perceive him.DISTINGUISHING FEATURES
One facial scar that cuts through the left side of his upper lip and along his cheekbone, a vicious-looking STRANGULATION SCAR around his neck, thick, dark angular brows, INTENSE dark eyes, and facial hair on his upper lip and chin.PHYSICAL BUILD
Lean muscled.DOMINANT HAND
Left, but with weapons, ambidextrous.

  NAME   
Man Zi Sam ( 敏 姿 心 ).  NICKNAME/ALIAS   
Zane, Zi Xin.  TITLES   
huyao / huyao xiaozi.  AGE   
16-30, timeline dependent. Default tends to be around 25.  DATE OF BIRTH   
October 25th.  GENDER & PRONOUNS   
Cis male, he / him / his.  ORIENTATION   
Demisexual / biromantic.  RACE / ETHNICITY   
Chinese.

  PARENTS   

  SIBLINGS   

  SIGNIFICANT OTHER   

  PET   

  NATIONALITY   
Chinese American.  CURRENT RESIDENCE   
Chinatown in Los Angeles, California.  OCCUPATION   
Triad member, casual botanist / herbalist / mycologist.  LANGUAGES   
Cantonese ( native ), Mandarin, and English.

PHYSICAL DISABILITIES & MENTAL / CHRONIC ILLNESS(ES)
Damaged throat and vocal cords, causes rough voice, chronic pain and sometimes tension that can obstruct airflow due to high stress. Zane also suffers from post traumatic stress disorder from his ordeal with The Black Dragons and the time he spent running / being homeless. The violence he endures every day by being in a gang only adds to it.

  FACE CLAIM   
Song Wei long ( 宋 威 龙 ).  HEIGHT   
6'0".  HAIR   
Nearly black, cropped short at the back and sides, longer on the top with front bangs.  EYES   
Dark brown / dark rusty gold in Grishaverse AU.

  ASTROLOGY   
Scorpio sun, Libra rising, Sagittarius moon.  MBTI   
INFJ-A – Advocate.THEME SONG
Riot – Three Days Grace
Bully – Shinedown  SCARS / TATTOOS / MARKINGS    one scar that curls around his throat, one that cuts through his left upper eyelid, another at the right edge of his upper lip, one scar that cuts across his left cheek. Lastly, he has jagged, one-lined scars across both palms. He also has about five small beauty marks scattered across his face as well.
Once Zane becomes a full member of the Red Fox Clan, he gains their tattoo on his forearm; a snarling fox adorned with a half broken Chinese fox mask. On that same arm, he has a bird skull surrounded by mushrooms and foliage on his bicep and shoulder.
At some point later, Zane gets a neck tattoo consisting of plum blossoms, mushrooms, a lunar moth and foliage. The plants are designed to look as though they're growing out of the scar across his throat. On his left arm, it's covered in watercolor-esque plum blossom branches.ALL OF ZANE'S SCARS AND TATTOOS CAN BE FOUND HERE.

introverted

cold

selfish

skeptical

serious

logical

disciplined

suspicious

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extroverted

warm

generous

openminded

playful

emotional

hedonistic

trusting

  SKILLS & ABILITIES  

The city of San Francisco, California is the home you've always known,

        But Chinatown is practically a city within a city, with its own diverse culture. You learn very young that this city within a city is meant to be a haven for those from China, where your great great grandparents were born. They came here, seeking a better life, seeking gold. In doing so, they founded your family's Chinese medicinal herb shop, Sang Gei Jyn ( 生機源 ), which in English translates to Source Of Vitality. It’s a business your parents expect you to continue long after they're gone.       The first language you learn is Cantonese, shortly followed by Mandarin. It's not until you're enrolled in the local school that you begin to learn the language spoken most broadly, English. It's vastly different from your native language, both in sound, speech and writing, but you're smart. This is a detail you learn from the adults around you, from their surprise by how swiftly you pick things up.

        School is something you thrive in and, once you begin to learn about the science and biology of the environment, it enthralls you. It goes hand in hand with what you’ve been itching to learn more about anyway — the plants and herbs used and sold in your family’s shop. You devour any and all details you can get your hands on and, soon enough, your knowledge is nearing that of your parents, which they’re delighted by.        Your aunt, uncle and two cousins live with you and you’ve grown up hearing your uncle argue with your parents about the shop being a perfect place for the Clan to use for the drugs they sell. Your mother is unrelenting in her refusal and your father follows suit, so it’s not something you pay much attention to anymore.        Everything changes after your mother is diagnosed with cancer sometime after you turn thirteen.

        By the time it’s diagnosed, there’s no hope of a cure. The only treatment option merely prolongs her life and that is of course something everyone wants. So, she undergoes chemotherapy and the treatment helps her live another two years. But by the time you’ve reached fifteen, she descends into a coma, from which she never wakes. You’ve been preparing for it, but the loss is no less unbearable. Your father struggles to run the shop, but you and your family members step up to help as much as you can.       All this does is give them more time and space to convince your father to let The Clan use the shop, now that your mother is gone. He resists for a few months, especially with your help when the arguments happen before or after school, but … with added financial strain, he eventually gives in and agrees.       You resent them all for it, but your father especially.

This boy even knows your name,

        Or, the Mandarin equivalent of your name, anyway. From the undercurrent of fear that now lives within your home and especially your family's business, from the way your father seems constantly on edge these days, you know better than to correct him. You still don’t know exactly why the clan seems to resent speaking anything other than Mandarin.        The message is loud and clear nonetheless and the knowledge of your father's fear, along with your own, spikes an odd mix of anxiety, dread and anger that you must swallow down. You tentatively tell him about the English name you chose ( Zane ) and, while he asks questions and seems to come from a place of curiosity, he still asks to use what he knows you by. You are too afraid to say no and it makes you angry.        The dread, the fear and the anger are still thrumming in the background when Long Zhi admits his struggles with speaking English. You have plenty of practice with helping others with school work, it would be easy enough to help him perfect his English speaking skill — and, perhaps in return, he would be willing to teach you to fight, so you don't have to feel this terrible, helpless fear and dread on a daily basis anymore.        Despite your initial impression of his rigidity, Long Zhi agrees to this. The more time you spend with him, you begin to understand that what you mistook for rigidity is actually a strong sense of tenacity … and obligation, given that he's expected to lead the clan himself someday. It's a type of expectation you can relate to.

        Or so you think.        As a teacher, Long Zhi has high expectations of you, but he is not unkind — it's far more challenging than anything else you've learned in your life, which is a much needed breath of fresh air. Nonetheless, you learn quickly and you revel in his positive reactions, even if they seem somewhat muted at first.        As you work on Long Zhi’s spoken English with him, it simply makes sense to be patient, reassuring and to praise him for the things he succeeds with. He strikes you as a fast, determined learner anyway, but he seems to flourish in a way that even surprises him. Soon enough, he can speak as well as any native, even with the heaviness of his accent.        The first time you inspire a real, involuntary smile out of Long Zhi, you feel like the breath has been swiped from your lungs. That feeling only intensifies the first time you hear the high, joyous sound of his laugh. He slowly starts to unravel from the protective shell he hides behind and you begin to realize that he is the embodiment of afternoon sunlight. He has an easy and fun brightness to him and you find that you crave his presence more and more with each passing moment. You don't know when exactly the shift occurred, but at some point he starts calling you Zi Xin less and Zane more.

        You, too, slowly begin to allow yourself to unravel in ways you didn't know you could — and Long Zhi responds to it with a warm eagerness that is more magnetic than anything you've ever known. With a twinge of both excitement and terror, you realize one day that you've fallen in love with him and you know for certain that, even if he feels the same way, these feelings are dangerous. But no matter how hard you try, you can't stop the way your feelings simply bleed out of you every time the two of you are alone — even when around others, the affection and warmth in your gaze is difficult to hide.        One day, Long Zhi confides in you about a name he's thinking about wanting to be called, outside of the clan, of course. Matt, he says, and you think the name suits him incredibly well. Zane and Matt, Matt and Zane. The nearly inseparable pair you become; you love the way it sounds.        The first time you kiss Matt, it feels like being struck by fucking lightening. He responds to you like he's been starving for this, aching for it in his bones and, in a way, so have you. His kisses, the sounds he makes, his fingers in your hair, his hands on you … all of it is deeply, maddeningly addicting, you feel as though you're going to vibrate out of your own skin. It's only now that you truly feel how much your time with him is limited, which he clearly feels too. You kiss him, offer affection, as many times as you're reasonably allowed to … which leads to more heated make-out sessions in hidden places than you're able to coherently count.

Somewhere deep within your soul, you knew this wasn't sustainable.

        You knew that eventually, someone would find out. Perhaps it's a testament of your then seventeen year old mind that all you thought would happen was that you would lose your alone time together. At the time, that fear was unbearably terrifying for you both, but looking back … you wish the consequences had been as simple and easy as that. Being in love with someone like Matt made you forget your fear, your survival instincts — and forgetting is a mistake you would vow to never make again.        It begins with your father stopping you at the stairs that lead into the upper apartment above the shop. The expression he wears immediately sets off alarm bells in your head and you feel a sharp bolt of terror rip through you. You swallow it down, still wearing your mask of ease as you agree with a curious note in your tone when he asks to talk to you alone. It's only after he turns from you to lead you into the back office that you let out a slow, quiet breath, attempting to expel the waves of fear.        It isn't what you're expecting by a long shot and that alone feels wrong, but you can't pinpoint the why of it. Xiao Dan, Matt's grandfather, has given your father an important job in Shanghai, China. It's urgent and must be kept discreet — so he can't even tell you any of the details of what the job is. You have never been to China before, you don't even have a passport … but every concern that comes to mind, there is a rational solution. Regardless, you know something is wrong, you feel it innately, but the idea of explaining why to your father is insurmountable.        Maybe if you had, your father would still be alive.

        You're robbed of the choice to say goodbye to Matt, both because you're instructed to not tell anyone and because you have only the rest of the afternoon and evening to pack up the essentials of your entire life. If it had only been the former, you would have snuck out to find him anyway — you were never prone to be much of a rule follower. Instead, you do as you're told and you do it for your father, your family, the shop … and the fear that thrums beneath your skin makes you believe you're doing it for yourself, too.        When you wake the next morning, the sun hasn't even come up yet. The world is dim and dreary to your half asleep mind and, briefly, you feel a deep seeded aching terror, a desire to pull the covers over your head and pretend that the last twenty-four hours were nothing but a dream.        But you know better. You reassure yourself that you can certainly sleep on the nearly fourteen hour flight. You take things one step at a time — because if you think any further than that, the terror will swallow you whole.        Your father is struggling with the reality of your situation, but he hides it well. You only recognize it because you have trained yourself to look deeper, to seek meaning in the tiny details, since he refuses to confide in you. He can't hide it from you, even though it's obvious he's trying and a twinge of irrational anger grips you. You're angry because he's afraid, you're angry because he doesn't realize how attuned you've become to the nuances of his mood to hide it better … you're angry because you're afraid, too.

        You take another look at your childhood home, the shop you love and are still expected to take over one day before getting into the taxi. You get an eerie sense that this will be the last time you see it.

        The drive is mostly silent, save for your father's two attempts to offer empty reassurances. You say nothing as you stare out at the rare sight of San Francisco streets devoid of any life. Given that the taxi is meant to drop you off, you expect the driver to pull into the loading zone. Instead, he makes his way to the domestic garage and your father's voice breaks the silence — he speaks to the driver in wavering Mandarin, the uncertainty and confusion in his voice instantly inspires a stab of fear in you.        But it's the fact that the driver deliberately ignores him that really sets the alarm bells blaring.        He finds a parking spot and, still without uttering a word to either of you, he turns the car off, gets out … and you hear all the doors lock. Your father is talking again, but it's in Cantonese now and he's speaking to you — it's difficult to focus on what he's saying when the terror that's building up inside you is so fucking loud, but you innately know by the sound of his voice that he's still trying to reassure you. The fear grips you so tightly that your response holds nothing but frustration and anger. You don’t mean it.        You have the means to fight back, but your father doesn't. There's very little you can do when both sides of the doors open and you're both dragged out on opposite sides. You thrash, you fight, you try to use all the tools you've learned — but pain explodes against the back of your head and all you see next is black.

When you come to, the first thing you notice is the scrape of rope against your wrists.

        The smell of concrete and rusted iron fills your senses — and you hear your father's voice again, speaking Mandarin still even in this moment, still trying to appease the clan. Rage, adrenaline, terror. Your hands are moving as you try to make sense of the knot in a jumbled panic. As your vision comes into focus, your father is bloodied and in the same position, directly across from you.        He speaks to you in Cantonese again, as if they won't understand — they know damn well how to speak it, to understand it, despite their rules. Your head is throbbing and you can't concentrate on the words, which only fuels your terror further. Then, you notice three things all at once. As your captives realize you’ve come to, their body language shifts as if to say finally. The man standing on your father's left glances pointedly towards the man behind him, whose hands are resting on your father's shoulders.        Then you see the glint of a knife.        Understanding comes in a terrible flash and a visceral terror and rage cuts through you. Your father is about to die, you realize, and for those few precious seconds, you think you could tear through the ropes with your bare hands. You finally find your voice, although it sounds strange to your ears. The only thing you manage to get out is the word   ❝No, ❞  over and over in a jumbled heap. You're willing your hands to move faster as you find a way to force the knot to loosen and the rope falls to the floor.

        But it's already too late.        The wet sound of the blade sinking into flesh, your father's grunt of pain, the sound of him choking on his own blood. The feeling that rips through you is so intense that it's incomprehensible — and then you feel something thin wrap around your throat from behind and tighten. It cuts into your flesh and the pain of it blocks out any other sensation in your body other than the burn in your lungs. You can't breathe, you can't breathe, you can't—        Somehow, you find your bearings with adrenaline and panic as you wrench your head and body backwards with as much force as you can. This takes the man by surprise and he stumbles. Gravity pulls you down, but you use the momentum to swing your legs over your head to land a hard kick to the man’s stomach.
 

        The rest comes to you in fragments. You’re on your feet and you run, seeking anything you can use as a weapon — and the first thing you find is thick shards of broken glass. It cuts into the meat of your palms, but you don’t feel it. You slice the throat of the man who tried to strangle you.The other two follow suit, but all you register is their lifeless bodies collapsing. You save the man who drove a knife into your father’s stomach for last. He tries to do the same to you, but you’re faster. You grip his wrist hard and twist until you hear the knife clatter to the concrete floor.        You grab for it while your free hand clamps around the man’s throat and you squeeze until he’s choking and wheezing.

       Then, you slowly drive the knife into his stomach, twisting painfully once it’s fully lodged in. He too lets out several grunts of pain and chokes on his own fucking blood. You hold steady until he goes limp.

        Silence finally falls around you and you unceremoniously shove the man’s lifeless body to the floor. Your heart is hammering in your ears as you make your way over to one of the many concrete pillars in the room and lean against it. Slowly, you slide down until you’re seated and you stare ahead, listening to your own gasping breaths until they eventually slow. It takes a while for the PAIN to find you, but even as your throat, head and hands throb, all you can do is contemplate what all of this means. Was this the consequences of your relationship with Matt, or had it all become some kind of elaborate trap that he’d been a part of all along?        You can't fathom how you’d be important enough to trap in the first place, but … thinking about it for too long is unbearably painful. So you stop. Instead, you hope Matt is okay and, while you wish you could find a way to reach him …. you realize the simple truth is that you’re too afraid to try. This time, your fear fills you with rage, heartache and anguish.

You don’t remember how you got the bodies into the trunk of the car,

        Nor do you remember which one you’d found the keys on. You remember burying your father’s body with careful attention, but you don't remember where you buried the others or how. At some point, you realize your throat and hands are bandaged and you’re no longer covered in blood. You can't go back to the city, so you decide on Los Angeles, which is roughly five hours away. The car has a little over half a tank of gas, so you drive until it runs out … then you decide to train hop. You come across other people in difficult situations, but none like yours.        You’re too scared to tell anyone anything — and even if you weren't, every time you try to speak, a visceral pain pierces through your throat. The first time, it elicits a stab of panic. Will I ever be able to speak again, you wonder?  And, with that panic you learn that, under certain stressors, your throat tenses and it feels as though you’re being strangled all over again. nightmares plague you when you try to sleep and you wake up gasping for air, your throat throbbing to the panicked beat of your heart.        You’re half asleep the first time someone assaults you. It’s the first time you’re forced to try to fight the way your throat closes up. You struggle, you end up with more injuries than you started, but you barely manage to fend them off before they kill you. The place you find to hide after you escape is dark and isolated and it’s there where your pent up emotions involuntarily overflow. It takes hours for you to reign it in, for you to be able to breathe somewhat normally again.

        You are so  fucking tired.        You learn to sleep lightly, and that you must be as violent and vicious as you were in the warehouse. You know it should scare you, what you’re capable of. Strangely, it doesn’t. Instead, you feel a sense of power and control, as if you’re gripping the autonomy that was ripped from you with both hands. You learn how to appear too dangerous to those who would hurt you, or worse, and how to morph that into something more warm and inviting to those who need protecting. While there are always those who want to do harm, there’s also always those who need protecting. You couldn’t protect your father, maybe you couldn’t even protect Matt in the end either, but you can protect them. It’s the only thing that keeps you going. It still hurts to talk, but the pain is getting more manageable. Your voice is irreparably changed into something rough, ragged, and you have to re-learn how to use it.        When you finally make it to Los Angeles, you know innately that there’s no hope of truly escaping the violence you’ve managed to outrun. A normal job is no longer an option for someone like you - not when most of them require references and background checks of some kind, your legal name. You are a killer, after all. So, you take odd jobs with the gangs who don't ask questions, who don't care about the answers. no one knows your real name, where you came from, nor the horrors you've endured and you intend to keep it that way.        Soon enough, you find a gang that you could see yourself properly joining. You speak to the Red Fox Clan’s leader, Li Ming, and he agrees to allow you the chance to prove yourself.

        And you work hard to do just that. You become known as someone ruthless and cunning when necessary, but you have an effortless, confident charm about you that many people find difficult to resist. The duality of it earns you the name Huyao ( 狐妖 ), fox demon, in Mandarin. Because of your young age, it’s sometimes paired with the casual sounding Xiaozi ( 小子 ), which just describes the delinquent you’ve grown to be in various ways. That’s fine, though — either way, people are less likely to mess with you and that alone is a victory.

        Once you have a stable roof over your head, clean clothes, food, some semblance of safety … you’re able to process what has happened to you. You finally let yourself grieve, you think?  And after everything, all that’s left to feel is rage. You make the decision that Xiao Dan must pay for what he’s done to you, for the loss of your father. You decide that you will destroy him — but there is nothing you can do without power and influence of your own. You decide that the slow, methodical take over of the Red Fox Clan is what will grant you that power and influence.        What you will do with it once it is within your grasp is uncertain — against all odds, a part of you hopes to see Matt again, even if his presence will undoubtedly complicate things. You hope that maybe, you can help him finally see the truth, find a way out. There is just as much of a chance of you never seeing him again … or worse, you will be forced into the role of his enemy. Whatever the outcome, you know you must make peace with it.

CANON

status canon
fandom fandomless
availability open
affiliated with @feilien
time period modern

        This verse takes place either in MODERN DAY CALIFORNIA, USA and his location solely depends on plot and timeline. He can be in Chinatown, San Francisco where the Black Dragon Clan is running drugs through his families shop after Zane's mother passes away, either before or after Zane and Matt meet. It could be shortly after he and his father get ambushed, after Zane NARROWLY escapes certain death and is traveling the five hours between San Fransisco and Los Angeles. Or it could be any point where Zane resides in Los Angeles, either before he joins The Red Fox Clan, or afterwards, once he makes A NAME AND REPUTATION for himself and he has set his long-term plan into action.        Of course, depending on plots and partners and stories we want to tell, we CERTAINLY have infinite room for alternate universes and the like !!

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GRISHAVERSE / SIX OF CROWS DUOLOGY

status alternate universe
fandom grishaverse
availability open
affiliated with @feilien
time period industrial

        Zane's story is ESSENTIALLY the same — the key differences are that he is from SHU HAN and that's where the beginning of his life takes place. He's a DURAST in hiding, because of the dangers of being Grisha in Shu Han. However, he still ends up nearly getting killed regardless and, in saving himself by killing four men but failing to save his father, he decides to RUN. He stows away on a ship headed to KETTERDAM and, once he gets there, Zane spends weeks, if not months, living on the streets in the Barrel.        He joins a gang, canonically The Red Fox Clan as his story goes, but of course there's PLENTY of room for different avenues and AUs !! Since I also write Kaz on thiefofcrows, it's easy to throw him in the mix and/or connect him to events happening in this verse. Ultimately up to partners if they want to do that.

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PEAKY BLINDERS

status alternate universe
fandom BBC's peaky blinders
availability closed
exclusive with @alreadybrcken
time period 1919-1929.
content warnings implications of forced underage sex work, rape, human trafficking and general sexual violence. This is a much darker verse that suits the source material.

        The BEGINNING of Zane's story is essentially the same, just with the adjustments of the time period. One big difference is that he immigrated with his family ( parents, aunt and uncle and cousins ) to the United States from Southern China within the 1850's, rather than having been born in the U.S. from third generation parents.
Zane's accent is heavier and his relationship with his culture and ethnicity has more nuance. In this verse, he also has only been forced to speak Mandarin in one place and mostly with one specific person, so he isn't exactly fluent. This means he primarily speaks Cantonese and English. He DOES NOT go by the name Zane until AFTER he has involvement with Tommy Shelby, so. Before meeting Long Zhi, he goes by his given name, Zi Sam and then only Long Zhi calls him Zi Xin. During his time in the brothel, he's forced to he goes by Zi Xin.        In this verse, Zi Sam spends a couple years on the streets after escaping the attempt on his life. However, after getting deeply spooked by the Black Dragon Clan ( likely done solely to push him in this direction, mind you ), Zi Sam seeks passage to an entirely different continent in order to escape ... and he indentures himself to do so, having believed it simply meant he would have to do some kind of work to pay off whatever he owed.
Unfortunately, it was ALL orchestrated by Xiao Dan in order to trap Zi Sam in a brothel where he is forced to work as an "escort". His contract is intentionally hiked far too high for him to ever manage to make enough to pay it off. He is also forced to go by his name in Mandarin, Zi Xin, rather than his given Cantonese name. Xiao Dan made this arrangement to not only TORTURE Zi Sam for the relationship he had with his grandson Long Zhi, but he was certain it would lead to his eventual brutalization and death.        However, once Tommy Shelby finally gives in to his desire for men, he connects and develops feelings for Zi Xin, which are indeed reciprocated. Unfortunately for Tommy, Zi Xin is desperate to escape his situation, not yet knowing about Xiao Dan's involvement and, after finding out about the details of Tommy's life, he reluctantly uses his secret desire to blackmail him into not only getting him OUT of the brothel, but providing him protection as well. Tommy harbors a resentful feeling of betrayal for this, but he pays off Zi Xin's indenture in full and integrates him into the staff that takes care of his home. He chooses the name ZANE in order to keep a low profile.        After the clan who owns the brothel attacks them both, Zane is forced to tell Tommy the secrets of his past. Together, they must fight back against those trying so desperately to drag Zane back into the brothel he came from ... and that means taking on The Black Dragon Clan as well. Their feelings for one another PERSIST, despite the circumstances and much to Tommy's frustration, and it's only a matter of time before they give in ... consequences be damned.

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MYTH / FOLKLORE

status alternate universe
fandom fandomless
availability open
affiliated with @alreadybrcken
time period modern by default, but this verse can be adapted to any timeline.

       
✴A note that I fully intend to write up something of a drabble to offer immersion for the backstory of this verse. Stay tuned !!
The general inspiration for the creature Zane becomes in this verse is inspired by Chinese folklore surrounding fox spirits, or Huli jing ( 狐 狸 精 ). There's different kinds of fox spirits and, in Zane's case, he becomes a fox demon ( 狐 妖 ) in particular. I've deviated from the traditional folklore in some ways and have created something original. THIS VERSE IS INTENDED TO BE FULLY COMPATIBLE WITH ANY VERSE WHERE OTHERWORLDY BEINGS AND OTHER SUPERNATURAL / PARANORMAL PHENOMENA EXIST. Please also keep in mind that some of this may morph, change and develop further as I use it more, as it's very new.        In this verse, Zane's story is the same — the only difference being that he technically does not survive the fight in the warehouse. He does kill his abductors, but they land a killing blow on him as well. Zane bleeds out, resting against a concrete pillar ... and, only after absorbing the Qi ( 气, life force ) of his slain enemies does he wake, reborn as a huyao.        If he wants to avoid suffering and a painful spirit death, he has no other choice but to kill and absorb a person's life force AT LEAST every two months. His story otherwise follows the same route as canon, just with the mythology / folklore aspects to bring some literal truth to his reputation.

        ◆ Creature Name: Huyao ( Mandarin ), Wu Jiu ( Cantonese ).
( 狐 妖; 'fox demon' ).
        ◆ Criteria for becoming a fox demon spirit: Has to die young, said death has to involve killing, violence, rage and/or generally unfinished business. After the person finally dies, absorbing the Qi of those they killed brings them back to life. They can offer blessings, luck and inflict curses.
        ◆ Criteria for becoming a general fox spirit: dying young peacefully, and they find purpose in aiding people and offering blessings and luck.
However … all it takes for a fox spirit to change into a fox demon is killing someone. They cannot go back to how they were before.POWERS / ABILITIES:        ◆ Shape Shifting - The ability to shape shift at will into fox form or human form. Can disguise themselves as other people this way if necessary, but it requires A LOT of power and focus. Requires recent consumption of Qi.        ◆ Absorption of Qi / Hei ( 气 Qi in Mandarin, 氣 Hei in Cantonese. Essentially someone's life force that flows through the body ) - While it revitalizes mind and body, it takes a heavy emotional and physical toll. Basically, you see this person's entire life flash before you, feel their feelings, experience their thoughts, ect.
Slows aging, makes immune to sickness and disease ( until the additional consumed Qi runs out ). If done frequently ( i.e. daily or at least weekly ), it can stop aging entirely and they become immune to sickness and disease indefinitely.
The MAXIMUM amount of time someone can go without consuming Qi is two months. By then, it feels like your body is trying to consume itself from the inside out. There's also a feeling of weakness, fatigue and you're more prone to illness.        ◆ Possession - can technically possess another human being, but similarly it requires a lot of power and focus. It also takes a heavy emotional toll just like consuming Qi does, because you're sharing a body with someone and in close proximity to their Qi.        ◆ Blessings / Luck / Curses - They can bestow various blessings, grant someone luck or inflict a curse on them.

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VERSENAME

status AU
fandom fandom
availability open
affiliated with none

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VERSENAME

status AU
fandom fandom
availability open
affiliated with @partnerurl

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LIU "MATT" LONG ZHI

@feilien ── heavily affiliated / partnered

verse dependent.
best friend, canon love interest,
arch nemesis.
 

interactions. | canon ship tag. | AU ship tag.

Thomas "Tommy" Shelby

@alreadybrcken ── heavily affiliated / exclusive

Peaky Blinders AU.
Employer, love interest.
 

interactions. | ship tag. | AU ship tag.

Firstname Lastname

@partnerurl ── exclusive

Short description of relationship.
 

interactions. | tag. | tag.

Firstname Lastname

@partnerurl ── ship exclusive

Short description of relationship.
 

interactions. | tag. | tag.

Firstname Lastname

@partnerurl ── main

Short description of relationship.
 

interactions. | tag. | tag.

Firstname Lastname

@partnerurl ── main

Short description of relationship.
 

interactions. | tag. | tag.

Firstname Lastname

@partnerurl ── main

Short description of relationship.
 

interactions. | tag. | tag.

Firstname Lastname

@partnerurl ── main

Short description of relationship.
 

interactions. | tag. | tag.

MAN ZING JI

        Zane's youngest cousin, she was about 12 / 13 when their family got fully entangled with the Black Dragon Clan. She too has been helping with the herbal shop since she was ten years old — her herbal / medicinal knowledge was MINIMAL then, but it has grown since the alleged loss of Zane and her uncle. All she knows is that Zane and her uncle left and there's no telling when they're coming back ... or if. Their family quickly acts as though they NEVER EXISTED, as if they were long dead and never coming back.        This is deeply distressing for her, but no matter what she tries, no one will talk about it. Her brother tells her off plenty for insisting, for asking, for causing trouble.        She doesn't stop asking because she's scared, she stops because she knows there's no use.        Her older brother has always had very little patience with Zing Ji and part of that is because of the PRESSURE AND EXPECTATIONS their father, Zane's uncle, puts on him. They clash when it comes to obedience, morals — and he sees the situation as inescapable and has accepted his fate while she refuses.        Zing Ji has always longed be close to Zane — he was moreso what she'd always wanted in an older brother; funny, protective, empathetic … and just seemingly so cool, collected and knowledgeable. His teasing was always well meaning and he was the only one who told her brother off when he was being too harsh with her.        Thus, Zane's potential loss hit her HARD. She doesn't know what really happened, nor if he's even still alive, but she intends to find out ... even at the risk of her own life.

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BAI LI MING

Li Ming is the official dragon head of the RED FOX CLAN. It is said that the clan was founded by his family several generations ago. He is known for the brutal murder of his own father when he was barely 20, the fight that ensued resulting in his scarred right eye that he can no longer see out of. Some say Li Ming's reasons for killing his father were fully justified — stories of ABUSE, violent narcissism and unhinged behavior forcing his handOthers say he just wanted power and control over the clan before he was ready and his father refused. Allegedly, his mother still lives, but she venomously refuses to speak of the incident. Regardless, Li Ming has an air of controlled reserve, but can be ruthless and brutal if he deems it necessary. He values hard work without complaint and loyalty — and despite his intimidating outward appearance, as long as you prove yourself, he takes care of his people and ensures they have a roof over their heads and people to rely on.While he has NO INTEREST in having children of his own to pass the clan to, it's rumored that he has taken ZANE under his wing for this exact purpose. Whether Li Ming plans to hand power to the young man when he can no longer lead is yet to be seen, but many believe this to be the case. Other rumors and hearsay suggest that Zane's clear ambitions to do exactly that will lead to history repeating itself and his taking over the clan will be after Li Ming's suspicious death

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LI YING JIAO

        Ying Jiao is Zane's CONTACT / SPY within the Black Dragon clan. Her younger brother escaped left the clan and, as soon as Zane caught wind of it, he'd swooped in and ensured he joined the Red Fox clan instead. In exchange for looking out for her brother / keeping him safe, Ying Jiao agreed to report back to Zane about the Black Dragons' business ... and, later on, about Matt.        She is strong willed, reserved and carries herself with dispassionate confidence. Ever since her brother left, she has been questioning the clan's motives. By the time she's reporting the Black Dragons' shady dealings to Zane, she has fully disengaged with her emotional connection to the clan.        Ying Jiao stays only because she wants to bring the Black Dragon clan down ... and gathering the information Zane needs is how they will accomplish that feat. Afterwards, she intends to join her brother on the outside — and Zane assures her that he could still certainly use someone to gather information for him on the outside too, once the Black Dragons are gone.        In the meantime, Zane helps pass letters and messages between them. Those letters, along with Zane's companionship, are the things that keep Ying Jiao going strong.

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FIRSTNAME LASTNAME

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FIRSTNAME LASTNAME

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FIRSTNAME LASTNAME

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GENERAL

• BLOG
• INBOX
• PROMO(S)
• MEMES / PROMPTS
• PINNED POST

TAGS

• IN CHARACTER
• CHARACTER STUDY
• MUSINGS
• VISAGE
• DRABBLES
• EDITS
• DRAWINGS / ART

VERSE TAGS

• MAIN CANON VERSE
• GRISHAVERSE
• PEAKY BLINDERS VERSE
• MYTH / FOLKLORE VERSE
• BROKEN MATT VERSE

TIMELINE TAGS

• TEENAGE YEARS
• ESCAPING SAN FRAN
• SURVIVING THE STREETS
• TRIAD MEMBER
• RISING THROUGH RANKS
• FINDING MATT
• FIGHTING TOGETHER
• POST BD DEFEAT

PB VERSE TIMELINE TAGS

• INDENTURED
• POST BLACKMAIL
• HEALING THE WOUND
• ZANE & TOMMY TOGETHER

EXTERNAL LINKS

• PINTEREST BOARD
• YTMUSIC PLAYLIST
• MATT
• KAZ'S BLOG